Wedding season

Come join us as we attend the wedding of one of our co-workers, Vone and his bride, Tieng.

You can hop in the car with us as we drive a few miles out of Phonsavan, the capital of Xieng Khouang Province, (about a 4 hour drive from Tha Thom) to the bride’s home. We arrive at 9am, just in time to watch the groom finish getting ready in the lawn in front of the house. A female relative has just finished applying his make-up and he’s getting help tying his tie. People joke that now he looks ‘falang’ (white like a foreigner).

We stand around awhile and chat with co-workers and close family and friends. The afternoon ‘wedding reception’ is a large ordeal and often 300 or more guests are invited (sometimes over 1,000 for city weddings). However, the morning wedding bacci (ceremony) is only for a small number of close family and friends.

From the lawn were the groom sits a small blessing ceremony commences, chants are sang and the groom is escorted to the bride’s house by a procession of family and friends. We join in with singing and clapping (there would be a drum, but somebody forgot it)!

Waiting for his Bride

When we arrive at the home we are informed that the bride is not ready yet (though we all know she is sitting inside waiting), this apparently is tradition. As we wait the groom’s family presents many gifts of food and drink (symbolizing that everything is prepared for couple’s life after marriage). The waiting ends as the families share some beer and the bride’s family then decides that it is time to start the ceremony.

Now the wedding bacci begins. Bacci ceremonies all have a similar theme, but each area of Laos adds a special twist to the ceremony. As we take our seat on the floor, we are sure to sit near a MCC co-worker, that way we can ask some questions when we don’t understand the ceremony. Some aspects of the ceremony that are the most interesting are:

The bride and groom feeding each other boiled egg and sticky rice (not cake, but similar to Western custom)

The bride and groom’s wrists being tied together with a single piece of string, blessed and then broken into two pieces and wrapped on each of their wrists.

The bride and groom asking for forgiveness and blessings from the elders...

 ...and then offering gifts to them.

Tying Bacci Strings

There isn’t any kissing or ring exchange… but at the end of the ceremony, parents decorate the bride with gold jewelry and family and friends tie bacci strings on the bride and groom.

Click Here for the full screen experience!

The wedding bacci may last 2 or more hours. After it is all finished we join the party that’s starting down in the yard! Guests begin to arrive so the bride and groom, parents and a selected hosts and hostesses line at the entrance near the large decorated arbor (In the picture you will notice the twenty plus people lined under the tent).

Dropping the Gift in the Card Box

At this wedding they decided to use local pine trees to adorn the area, but at other weddings you may see palm branches, vines or Christmas lights. As guests enter under the arbor, they are offered a drink of whiskey and then drop their envelope of money into a special card box. Packages aren’t expected so there’s no gift table. Once a majority of the guests arrive and we’ve found a nice table to sit at, the eating and dancing begins!

Wedding Tent with Guests

Bride and Groom Visiting our Table

Wedding food doesn’t vary, you can count on having sticky rice, lap (chopped meat (usually cooked) with mint and spices), soup, salad, and a sweet snack or fruit. Some weddings may also serve ‘ragoo,’ a French influenced soup that is eaten with French bread. It’s really tasty, but this wedding isn’t serving any. The bride and groom are also making their way around to each table offering guests a shot of whiskey. You can take a quick shot if you want (but beware! It’s strong stuff!). Then give the couple a small gift of money for their new life together.

Saap, Saap (Delicious!)

The music has started now, and it’s loud! We can’t do much talking, but it’s fun to watch the dancing. In Laos they do not have the ‘father-daughter’ dance, but rather the bride and groom start it off by taking a turn together. I will warn you, if you are a foreigner you are guaranteed to be invited to dance at least once during the party! But don’t worry; Lao dancing is really easy, and fun!

Wedding Sound System

Wedding Party

Bride and Groom Dance

After all the eating, talking with friends, watching the dancing or possibly joining in with the dancing…whew…you are probably getting tired! It’s time to head back now, but we hope you have enjoyed a taste of a Lao wedding!